Monday Motivation #2

Hey there 🙂 long time no see with the Monday motivations right? But it’s Christmas week and there will be cookies and so much food involved – we better get to it!

SO without further ado here goes nothing:

Calendar Week 50: 18th December – 24th December 

Focus: Run

Screen Shot 2017-12-17 at 10.23.10 PM

Monday will be quite stressful for me and I won’t have time to run in the morning and running in the evening after practice is kind of pointless which is why I’m doing a bike session instead.

You may wonder why I put the focus on running this week, but if you look at the Lacrosse and the running section together you see there’s more running than expected. I may do a Tempo/Sprint Session in the stadium on Tuesday – depending on how much time I need for work and Christmas Presents.

Let me know what you are doing this week and as always – listen to your body! When I feel like my body and my muscles need a break I don’t do a session even if it’s on the schedule. We can’t always influence how much work or stress we have, so taking my 20 min yoga and meditation in the morning to listen to my body helps me decide if it is healthy and will have a training effect.

Have fun and enjoy your week 🙂



November Recap

I know it’s almost the middle of December but I got inspired by Lucy Moons Idea of creating a monthly recap just to reflect on the past month and what actually made me happy, sad, giggle with laughter or cry tears. Another way of expressing gratitude to every single day passing and coming.

First of all November has been cold. I finally came around to wear all my cosy jumpers but the downside to it all is you can’t combine it very well with shorts and shorts shouldn’t be your ideal winter or autumn clothes anyway so I had to stick with jeans. There is something about jeans though that I don’t like. Mainly that you rarely find ones that fit perfectly and are comfortable at the same time as well as look good. I just realised that I am not as much of a Shirt-and-Cardigan/Jacket person anymore which is interesting considering that was last winters favourite outfit and my wardrobe has got a ridiculous amount of shirts but maybe only around 10 jumpers. I also don’t wear heads or scarves as much as I did last winter, mainly because I spend so much time outside that the cold doesn’t really bother me as much and I am not involved in any singing projects at the moment so I don’t worry about getting a sore throat or a cold as long as I can still play Lacrosse. When I play I don’t mind the rain or the cold as others do though I try to dress with at least three layers. During an especially cold evening practice I wore gloves but I disregarded them after warm up, like my jacket, because I figured out that I just don’t like playing with gloves. Remembering that evening makes me smile because I remember Caro, barely able to move, with at least 5 jackets and jumpers on and still shivering – She kinda looked like a Teddy Bear, not really able to move her arms properly.


Speaking of Lacrosse, my one and only love – I was very pleased with myself when I realised that I had attended every single practice in November. Though at the moment I’m struggling to get better I don’t feel any pressure from the team. I feel like they are my safety net and they never complain that I dropped the ball for the hundredth time that day but rather encourage me to keep on trying and tell me that I will get better eventually. I also refocused on my Triathlon Season – a bit at least. Not as much as I should have probably done but I don’t want to put too much pressure on myself so I decided to just go along with it and see what comes of it.


Same applies to University. Since I finally dropped all of my English Classes, Lectures and Seminars in order to refocus what I want to do (and have more time for personal development, e.g. free time for myself), I am feeling as though the few seminars and lectures I have left for Journalism are mainly sit, listen, understand and I don’t really know where to begin studying really. I’ve had all of my presentations already at the beginning of this semester so I’m kinda in the air on what to do about the whole “studying” situation. I’m just hoping it will get better once I have Sports as my second subject. Also because the feeling crept inside that I am nowadays mainly taking the train to get to class in the morning, wait around afterwards for a ridiculous amount of time until practice to take the train back home.


For much of the same reasons I quit English I also quit Choir. It doesn’t reflect on who I am in this period of my life so I decided it would be best to focus on the things that actually resemble me and what I want to do right now.

I’m somewhere between deeply resenting train rides and thoroughly enjoying them – depending on the time of day and mood situation happening. At the end of the month I realised though that I should probably try to get an apartment or a room or something near the university because riding home from practice in the evening does not only take upon a lot of time, I’m also shivering all the time, no matter how many clothes I put on after practice. In the mornings I consider it the best thing to just listen to Music – this month I’ve gone back to enjoying hiphop again like I used to, revelling in the new songs and moods I found and falling in love with artists I used to listen to all over again, all whilst discovering a whole new side of myself. If I had to choose an artist I’ve listened to the most it would probably be Post Malone or Drake, though Haley Kiyoke’s music really got under my skin as well this November. As of favourite songs It would probably be Camila Cabelos’s Havana, Issues by Julia Michaels, the Beautiful and Damned by G-Eazy ft Zoe Nash and Candy Paint by Post Malone.

One thing I am really proud of this month is that I’ve spend more time writing again. I am very fortunate to have found some very inspiring people that make it easy to write down ideas and create based on stories I hear or opinions or events I discuss with them.

I didn’t really take the time to read a lot this month though, besides online articles so I just started reading Nutshell by — which I picked up at the train station because it sounded interesting. I have yet to finish Girl heart Girl by Lucie Sutcliffe but I’m halfway through so I’m optimistic about finishing it before Christmas comes around. I immensely enjoyed felinipralinis blog posts this month as well as her Instagram. I’m always looking out for her Insta-Stories because she has something so positive and motivating radiating from her, plus she studies at the same university as I do and is thus highly relatable. As for youtube I didn’t really have time to catch up with everything I wanted to catch up on, considering that I don’t have Wifi on the train and therefore can’t watch videos then, leaving me to scroll through my subscriptions before I go to sleep. Not the healthiest of things to do and I really want to try to get rid of it in December. Seeing as I want to change my social media presence – including youtube as well – I watched a lot of Casey Neistat and Peter McKinnon this month as well as anticipating new videos from the gymnast and vlogger Nial Wilson, Lucy Moon, Dodie and Arielle Scarcella and Rose and Rosie.

I finally came around to watching stranger things during train rides as well to see what all the fuss is about, because it comes up quite often during conversations with team members. To be completely honest it is a good show. It is made very well and the storyline is mesmerising. BUT I am insanely crept out by it. I’d much rather watch it together with friends than at night, alone, on a train ride back home.

November was also full of firsts: My first Lacrosse Game ever, feeling like a true student for the first time while studying in the chemistry library with Leo, my first Lacrosse stick arriving, writing the first chapter of my current book project (and immediately deleting it afterwards to recover it a couple of minutes later), getting hit by a Lacrosse ball square in the face for the first time and realising that it only hurts but doesn’t necessarily leave a bruise and going on team events such as 3-D Minigolf and Pasta Nights for the first time in my life.


November really has brought a lot of new things into my life, most of all the people I learned to relish and appreciate so much and from which I learned how to grow as a human being. I have a feeling that I changed quite a lot lately, especially in the past month. I just hope this change made me a better person, since I naturally strive to be the best version of myself every day.


As for December I really wish to find myself more in what I am doing and get around to creating more content instead of just writing down all the ideas I have. I hope to be more consistent and a little more chilled out at the same time, giving me a chance to breath as well as sigh in proud relief after finishing a particularly tough project. What I know already is that December will be filled with just as much happy memories as November and incredibly warm and wonderful people that I have grown to love and adore so strongly within such a short period of time and that I am so incredibly fond of.

The one when I’m a Goalie

Hi. Me again. Saturday was my very first Lacrosse Game – as Goalie. And I am as surprised as you that I survived.

It all started with a wave of flu and half of the team being sick – unfortunately both our Goalies as well which meant either playing without a goalie or not playing at all which would have been an automatic 0 – 10 loose. We couldn’t let that happen so they asked me last Tuesday if I would be willing to play as a Goalie and of course I said yes. For me it was a certainty to help the team in whichever way I possibly could – even if that meant a lot of bruises and quite some respect for the position of the Goalie. So as I went to my first and only practice on Friday I was nearly shitting my pants so to say because I realised what I got myself into. I am constantly self doubting everything I do already so naturally I felt incredibly unsure and like I was the worst Goalie that ever existed on this planet. If it wasn’t for this incredible team and especially this one Person I would have probably quit. Jara kept telling me that I can do it and that I will do good and that my best will be enough and with that and her spontaneous hugs whenever I actually got the ball I felt reassured that it is the right thing I am doing. Everyone on the team encouraged me to not be afraid and that I will be fine.

Saturday morning came and I was everything but fine. I couldn’t sleep the night before because every time I fell a sleep I had night terrors of balls hitting me in the face and various other places and I couldn’t eat because I felt incredibly sick to the stomach – fortunately not the kind of sick that makes you throw up but rather the kind that makes you want to crawl into your bed and cuddle with your blankets while hiding under said. I still can’t exactly tell what I was afraid of  – I’m usually not the type that gets afraid – but for some reason I think I didn’t want to let down or disappoint the team. They’ve been so good to me and welcomed me so much that I put even more pressure on myself. They tried to take that pressure off of me but I just couldn’t believe them.


The first half started and I was a bloody nervous mess. I let one ball after another in and only managed one save. The other team would have scored even more goals if it hadn’t been for my amazing teammates! They fought like lions for me and tried to keep the ball away from me as much as they could – even though they had to run even more than usual with no substitute player due to our decimated number. They told me all the time that I was doing well and everything’s gonna be fine. But I wasn’t convinced. I saw the goals on the board and it looked everything but fine at the end of the first half: 7 – 4 for the other team.

Screen Shot 2017-12-02 at 10.40.13 PM.png

I was shattered and deep into my own thoughts when Jara suddenly hugged me and told me I should believe in myself and that it will work out in the end. And only then I started to believe her. She put so much faith in me – everyone did and I realised I needed to jump over my own shadow if I didn’t want to let down this incredibly awesome team that believed in me from the first go. So when I went back to the goal in the second half I was positive that I’m gonna give it my freaking all and I actually did improve a lot. The whole team felt stronger and they managed to help me out even more and shoot 5 more goals to  equalise the score.

The game ended 9-9 and believe me I was relieved it was over because as much as I would love to tell you otherwise – I was freezing my butt off because you don’t really get to run much as a Goalie. I wasn’t happy with the outcome though because I think I could have put more effort in the first half and could have been better, which still kind of bugs me but I can’t change it now so I’ll have to accept it and deal with it.

Right now I am just really really happy that I am going back to being a field player today, with my own stick and without any protection wear besides my mouthguard. I wear my bruises with pride even though they hurt a lot because I know I took them for the team and I would gladly do it again!

One for all and all for one!!!

Thank you Jara for being your awesome self – I couldn’t have done it without you! Thank you Marlene, Caro, Ella, Maike, Maike, Sophie, Pati, Katha, Loni, Julia, Tobi, Verena, Lena and Nici (and the rest of the team) for supporting me so much on and off the field. I owe you guys big time! You are the best team I could wish for!!!I am proud to be a Musketeer! ❤


Monday Motivation #1

Monday. New day, new week, new chance to start all over.

Here’s my first ever weekly sports schedule for you guys to keep myself motivated and to maybe help motivate others to start with a regular sport workout.

Calendar Week 48 – 27th Nov – 3rd December

Focus: Bike

Screen Shot 2017-11-28 at 9.10.14 AM

As you can see, a lot of Intervalls this week and quite a bike focus – as intended. Since it is currently raining cats and dogs the past couple of days I chose not to bike outside and instead use the TACX trainier from my mom in front to the TV or much rather with my workout playlist.

Here are a couple of songs I like to listen to when I’m doing sports:

  • Wolves – Selena Gomez ft Marshmallow
  • Whatever it takes – Imagine Dragons
  • Glorious – Macklemore ft Skylar Grey
  • Rockstar – Post Malone ft 21 Savage
  • Phases (Autograph Remix) – ALMA ft French Montana
  • Blem – Drake
  • KMT -Drake ft Giggs
  • Skybar – Joelina Drews
  • The beautiful and damned – G-Eazy ft Zoe Nash
  • Awful things – Lil Peep ft Lil Tracy
  • Butterfly Effect – Travis Scott
  • Rollin’ like a stoner – Vic Mensa
  • In the End – Linkin Park
  • Worth it – 5th Harmony
  • New Rules – Due Lipa

Here – but not really

I thought studying in Mainz and Living at home would be the easiest solution. I never would have figured that I would be involved in student life so soon – mainly with the LAX team of course. But nonetheless I spend so much time on trains or waiting for the latter it makes me sick. Like literally sick because I don’t get enough sleep plus I have to leave early in the morning which is alright as long as I am just studying Journalism but next year I will have twice the workload with the additional Sport and Sportscience lectures and seminars.

So right now I’m wondering if it wouldn’t be better for my physical as well as my mental health if I either do my drivers licence and get a car as soon as possible or if I try to look for a small room in a shared flat for 3-4 times a week, after practice and maybe before Game days as well. I don’t want to rely on the German Train system because if I do – I am loosing for sure.  I feel like it’s time to evolve but I’m not sure how it is supposed to work.

I mean don’t get me wrong – I’ve been living on my own for 3 years before but it is just really complicated to support myself. And I love my home and the way I made it my own. I’m not moving out, so I would just basically be living out of a suitcase and I don’t know if I would be fine with that. Yet I find myself craving for my own place again – maybe because everyone around me has their own flat, or room at least, and I miss the independence and maybe because I love inviting people over and I can’t do that at home because it is so far away.

Today I applied to 5 different shared flats and I looked up the next one-week drivers licence class for December. I’m trying to keep doors open or rather open them in the first place. I need to figure out a way and I think however it works out as long as it does, I’m fine with it.


Two months ago I would have never thought that I would want to spend so much time here and that I would find a team as awesome as the Musketeers. I feel so much welcomed by each and everyone on the team and so very much supported! And I am really really happy about the close friendship I have with Leo. We’ve been sort of friends before at the musical school and it is amazing how much has changed in both our lives in the one year we barely had contact, yet we instantly connected again! I am really thankful I can talk to her and study with her. She is really precious and I am glad we reconnected thanks to University!

With everything that is going on at the moment and loads of secret projects I can’t yet tell you about I shouldn’t forget that I still am first and foremost a student, so I’m gonna pack up and head to my seminar now.




Student struggles

What happens when two friends sit in a otherwise silent library – one trying to study ridiculously complicated chemistry the other trying to write on her current book project?

Probably not much productiveness… And this is not a punch line cos this is not a joke.

IMG_6865 3

But it’s not entirely true either. I can only speak for myself but I actually accomplish more with Leo studying beside me than I would sitting alone. Probably because she is so focused and ambitious and I just try not to distract her. Though the occasional laugh, snapchat and just general conversation about anything and everything helps to refocus again on the task on hand. It is the silent knowledge of someone being there with you going through the same dilemma of trying to push through and this really helps staying concentrated.


Plus the Chemistry Library has a way nicer view than the Central Library has! It is such a different atmosphere and I rather enjoy working here. The productiveness level is turned up and so I’ll better get back to writing before my mind wanders off again to other stupid stuff that’s been bugging me lately and getting the best of me.

Another struggle lately seems to be that you only see daylight when you’re switching buildings between classes and lectures because I at least leave in the morning around 6ish and only get home after practice which would be around 11ish. Tough today was a really nice day with a lot of autumnal sunshine and rather warm 13 degrees Celsius accompanied by really nice music.

Todays Top-5 Playlist-Songs:

  1. Candy Paint – Post Malone
  2. The Beautiful & Damned – G-Eazy, Zoe Nash
  3. My Shit – A boogie Wit da Hoodie
  4. iSpy – KYLE ft. Lil Yachty
  5. Feelings – Hayley Kiyoko

From idea to written story

My writing process

I’ve talked about ideas coming into my head on a regular basis. Now I thought I might describe my process of writing a bit more. Enjoy 🙂

So usually I start with doodling and jotting down ideas on paper as they come to me. It all looks messy and unorganised – sometimes it’s just names even. After I have played with the basic plot line a bit and established WHO is going WHERE with WHOM and WHY I start with Personal Files as I like to call them. Every Character that plays a bigger role and reappears throughout the story gets one of these sheets with not just their personal information but also kind of their life’s story. I try to make them as humanly as possible and for that I give them character trades – the good ones as well as the bad ones.

Sometimes, if family is involved, I draw out Family Trees or Draw Character Constellations – usually on a sheet of paper. For organisational purposes I scan everything I’ve jotted down and save it in a folder. (Let me know if you want to know more about my filing system in the comments.)

Screen Shot 2017-11-17 at 3.17.07 PM

Starting with a blank page often is very hard so I try a technique that is called Freeflow. I just start writing random things that come to my mind and got to do with the book and most of the time that develops into a plot line. I reedit quite a lot, daily at the moment but I save the edited version as a copy with the day tag. I just like to be able to look at older versions of the story.

Screen Shot 2017-11-17 at 3.17.46 PM

My plot is a different document than the actual book with which I usually start when I’ve got the outline of the first chapter in my mind. The second chapter for me personally is much harder than the first and the one that gets reedited more than a few times. Probably because I established a style in the first chapter and need to figure out how to transfer it.

In the picture above you can clearly see that the Name for my current project was established within the first two weeks (though the idea for the book was in my mind for over 3 months until I started with the actual book). And it only happened because I decided to go another way and focus my storyline on different things than I intended with my first draft.

When you’re writing you have to be able to make compromises as you go along. Not everything is going to work out as you planned it in the first place. It took me a while to accept it but the sooner you do, the better your writing will get.

From this point on (assuming you have already developed and edited a reasonable plot) it is basically just you and the computer writing down chapter after chapter, editing, reediting and deleting.

If you have any questions feel free to contact me.