I know it’s almost the middle of December but I got inspired by Lucy Moons Idea of creating a monthly recap just to reflect on the past month and what actually made me happy, sad, giggle with laughter or cry tears. Another way of expressing gratitude to every single day passing and coming.
First of all November has been cold. I finally came around to wear all my cosy jumpers but the downside to it all is you can’t combine it very well with shorts and shorts shouldn’t be your ideal winter or autumn clothes anyway so I had to stick with jeans. There is something about jeans though that I don’t like. Mainly that you rarely find ones that fit perfectly and are comfortable at the same time as well as look good. I just realised that I am not as much of a Shirt-and-Cardigan/Jacket person anymore which is interesting considering that was last winters favourite outfit and my wardrobe has got a ridiculous amount of shirts but maybe only around 10 jumpers. I also don’t wear heads or scarves as much as I did last winter, mainly because I spend so much time outside that the cold doesn’t really bother me as much and I am not involved in any singing projects at the moment so I don’t worry about getting a sore throat or a cold as long as I can still play Lacrosse. When I play I don’t mind the rain or the cold as others do though I try to dress with at least three layers. During an especially cold evening practice I wore gloves but I disregarded them after warm up, like my jacket, because I figured out that I just don’t like playing with gloves. Remembering that evening makes me smile because I remember Caro, barely able to move, with at least 5 jackets and jumpers on and still shivering – She kinda looked like a Teddy Bear, not really able to move her arms properly.
Speaking of Lacrosse, my one and only love – I was very pleased with myself when I realised that I had attended every single practice in November. Though at the moment I’m struggling to get better I don’t feel any pressure from the team. I feel like they are my safety net and they never complain that I dropped the ball for the hundredth time that day but rather encourage me to keep on trying and tell me that I will get better eventually. I also refocused on my Triathlon Season – a bit at least. Not as much as I should have probably done but I don’t want to put too much pressure on myself so I decided to just go along with it and see what comes of it.
Same applies to University. Since I finally dropped all of my English Classes, Lectures and Seminars in order to refocus what I want to do (and have more time for personal development, e.g. free time for myself), I am feeling as though the few seminars and lectures I have left for Journalism are mainly sit, listen, understand and I don’t really know where to begin studying really. I’ve had all of my presentations already at the beginning of this semester so I’m kinda in the air on what to do about the whole “studying” situation. I’m just hoping it will get better once I have Sports as my second subject. Also because the feeling crept inside that I am nowadays mainly taking the train to get to class in the morning, wait around afterwards for a ridiculous amount of time until practice to take the train back home.
For much of the same reasons I quit English I also quit Choir. It doesn’t reflect on who I am in this period of my life so I decided it would be best to focus on the things that actually resemble me and what I want to do right now.
I’m somewhere between deeply resenting train rides and thoroughly enjoying them – depending on the time of day and mood situation happening. At the end of the month I realised though that I should probably try to get an apartment or a room or something near the university because riding home from practice in the evening does not only take upon a lot of time, I’m also shivering all the time, no matter how many clothes I put on after practice. In the mornings I consider it the best thing to just listen to Music – this month I’ve gone back to enjoying hiphop again like I used to, revelling in the new songs and moods I found and falling in love with artists I used to listen to all over again, all whilst discovering a whole new side of myself. If I had to choose an artist I’ve listened to the most it would probably be Post Malone or Drake, though Haley Kiyoke’s music really got under my skin as well this November. As of favourite songs It would probably be Camila Cabelos’s Havana, Issues by Julia Michaels, the Beautiful and Damned by G-Eazy ft Zoe Nash and Candy Paint by Post Malone.
One thing I am really proud of this month is that I’ve spend more time writing again. I am very fortunate to have found some very inspiring people that make it easy to write down ideas and create based on stories I hear or opinions or events I discuss with them.
I didn’t really take the time to read a lot this month though, besides online articles so I just started reading Nutshell by — which I picked up at the train station because it sounded interesting. I have yet to finish Girl heart Girl by Lucie Sutcliffe but I’m halfway through so I’m optimistic about finishing it before Christmas comes around. I immensely enjoyed felinipralinis blog posts this month as well as her Instagram. I’m always looking out for her Insta-Stories because she has something so positive and motivating radiating from her, plus she studies at the same university as I do and is thus highly relatable. As for youtube I didn’t really have time to catch up with everything I wanted to catch up on, considering that I don’t have Wifi on the train and therefore can’t watch videos then, leaving me to scroll through my subscriptions before I go to sleep. Not the healthiest of things to do and I really want to try to get rid of it in December. Seeing as I want to change my social media presence – including youtube as well – I watched a lot of Casey Neistat and Peter McKinnon this month as well as anticipating new videos from the gymnast and vlogger Nial Wilson, Lucy Moon, Dodie and Arielle Scarcella and Rose and Rosie.
I finally came around to watching stranger things during train rides as well to see what all the fuss is about, because it comes up quite often during conversations with team members. To be completely honest it is a good show. It is made very well and the storyline is mesmerising. BUT I am insanely crept out by it. I’d much rather watch it together with friends than at night, alone, on a train ride back home.
November was also full of firsts: My first Lacrosse Game ever, feeling like a true student for the first time while studying in the chemistry library with Leo, my first Lacrosse stick arriving, writing the first chapter of my current book project (and immediately deleting it afterwards to recover it a couple of minutes later), getting hit by a Lacrosse ball square in the face for the first time and realising that it only hurts but doesn’t necessarily leave a bruise and going on team events such as 3-D Minigolf and Pasta Nights for the first time in my life.
November really has brought a lot of new things into my life, most of all the people I learned to relish and appreciate so much and from which I learned how to grow as a human being. I have a feeling that I changed quite a lot lately, especially in the past month. I just hope this change made me a better person, since I naturally strive to be the best version of myself every day.
As for December I really wish to find myself more in what I am doing and get around to creating more content instead of just writing down all the ideas I have. I hope to be more consistent and a little more chilled out at the same time, giving me a chance to breath as well as sigh in proud relief after finishing a particularly tough project. What I know already is that December will be filled with just as much happy memories as November and incredibly warm and wonderful people that I have grown to love and adore so strongly within such a short period of time and that I am so incredibly fond of.